Dark Garden

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

To Leonard:

The leaves; hues of yellow and brown
Harken! My pain, this sorrowful sound...
Fret not, for a cut above the stem
Opens new growth, brings past to an end
So no I don't frown
Gaia blossoms-
I smile.

Nature left alone, is ever-resilient.

Finally back from the Sabah-tical to quote Lu Yang, whom I met in Sabah of course. Now yes, I'm sure Xue Wei would like to know how torturous Sabah was. Well, surprisingly, I was still able to embrace my linguistic roots there despite the awful lack of civilisation. I shall split the entire trip into three parts; The calm before the storm, The maelstrom itself, The rainbow during the aftermath.

The first day was just pure uncertainty from the second I arrived at the school porch, late. Thanks to the convenient jam and my mum insisting that I get something to eat from...7-11? Killed time from 12.30 till 2.30 talking to Ming Xuan and gang, mainly gossiping about teachers. Then it was self-conversing and dota line-up thinking in the buses to Senai Airport. Senai Airport, seemed so dismally tiny BEFORE OB Sabah or rather, Crocker Range, but I'll get to that later. So we got some free time there! Like 15 minutes wow. Before more dota line-up thinking in the plane. Boredom redefined...At the OB Sabah base camp...Oh yes, all 45 of us were marvelling at the splendid facilities there (Oh yes, that's what we thought during the land expedition)before we had dinner at this "Great Hall" before which we had "Moment of thanks". Naturally, I thanked Gaia, Goddess of Earth. Ah, but we were still seated in our little cliques...Something Outward Bound always manages to abolish...I was still on my cough medication...And still coughing...This is what the doctor said, "No fried food, No spicy food, No chicken". We had spicy soup, long beans with EGG and fried chicken. You gotta love camp food. Bah, I ate white rice with fried chicken, poisoning my prescribed diet in the first meal. But what was interesting was the grouping later. Ming Xuan and I were under the impression that the groups would still be split according to the different special programmes but hey, we were diversified. Technically, I wasn't put into a group because I was in the last group after all others had been called out so it was pretty obvious who my group members were. My first thought was "Ming Xuan! Hurrah! Someone I know!" and "Ahem Sean...". Of course, there were fun people like Jing Dong and others I knew like Jonathan and recently at the airport, Benjamin. Now our group members in no particular order:

Chuan Yu
Kelvin
Jonathan
Jing Dong
Benjamin
Ephraim
Sean
Ming Xuan
Yao Nian
Jie Xuan
Lu Yang

Day 2 was "bonding day". I was thinking how uncaring our instructor Mark was because he seemed so "dao" if you get what I mean. Colloquial terms...Well I found the second day quite meaningful as it was the day people actually started talking to one another and the day where we each identified our individual strengths (Weaknesses later). It was rather successful I might say. Through Ming Xuan, Lu Yang and I could start talking. And Ephraim...Strangely through...Vancome Lady? Because I was going "Tchaa...You know what?" Then suddenly Ephraim said "uh uh" and I was rather shocked. And I thought I was the only one in my group who watched Vancome. But Ephraim explained that it was Gregory who introduced him to MadTv and from there, Vancome Lady. But then again, Ephraim, and Leonard after he watched Vancome, think she's mean...Sigh, she's such a nice lady and only Zi Heng and Xu jun agree with me. It was a start. Of the land expedition the following day. I think my profile got augmented after we went to try pitching tents...Mark thought of the worse case scenario (Which so happened to be what happened on the first day of the land expedition) and brought us to this forested area with guiding strings around trees to try pitching our tents. Mark was instructing us on how to pitch the tent (Well Ephraim and Chuan Yu would have known how to from the start since they were scouts) when Benjamin screamed. Which wasn't very wise considering the fact that he already did during trekking and unfortunately, Kelvin being Benjamin's anti-thesis, liked to make the screaming known to everyone. A red ant bit Benjamin's leg. It's sad. Benjamin was the first. So Kelvin imitated him and screamed mockingly...Naturally, people laughed. Wasn't that funny when the red ants were on them though. Those ants were actually the usual Singapore variety I handled since Primary One so I tore them apart with ease. But it really shocked me that Kelvin and the other seemingly tough guys were afraid of the red ants. So I was like a woodpecker pecking a tree, grabbing ants I saw on their shirts. Kelvin's, Jing Dong's and pretty much everyone else, earning the nickname "Insecticide" (Which he still uses now even) from Kelvin. Kelvin in particular, was fascinated by how I tore the ants apart or decapitated them. There was one particular ant on me which I de-legged one by one before throwing it on the ground and spat, "Die worm!" And Kelvin was very amused and went on telling others about me killing ants. I found out that Ephraim wasn't a spoilt brat (No offense Ephraim!) but was actually much more capable than me at this camping stuff. I didn't really know how to chop the firewood at all but Ephraim was doing it like a professional. Then we were scheduling our meals after we got our rations. And we were like saying it was the "Yu Shan Chu Fang" (Ephraim Lady Choy!)or "Imperial Kitchen" as we decided our meals. Lu Yang showed his leadership prowess then though, adamant on organising and cutting down the amount of rations to bring. Jing Dong's like at the other end of the spectrum, insisting that we bring everything. However, Lu Yang and I got a menu planned out in the end and voila! Now, I brought...10 cans, a bottle of oil, a bottle of soy sauce, vegetables, a basin, 10+ cereal packets. Not as impressive as Jing Dong though who carried the pot and tent sheet, with 10 cans and god knows what else.

The Land expedition was...Most memorable. First time I ever trekked so much but for the load aspect I was rather used to the 15+ kg haversack as my schoolbag alone was 10 and on Mondays 14.5. It was walking and walking and for the first half of the first day I could show gratitude to my babies and I caressed, thanked and apologised to them. The terrain was pretty manageable up till the lunch point where we had to move down this mossy slope yes, without handholds or safety straps or whatnot. Took the packed lunch with Ming Xuan and Jie Xuan and ah...Ming Xuan and I felt that each of us should keep our own styrofoam packets in our haversacks. I offered to keep Ming Xuan's with mine. As for the others...Somehow, someone gave the others the idea to collect all the garbage bags in one big plastic bag, thus forming the "trash bag". And poor Jing Dong had to carry it for so long before he passed it on to Ming Xuan and me. Lu Yang and Ephraim helped too. As for Sean..."I have to adjust my bag strap" Saddening. But the highlight for the first day was the disappearance of two group members and one accompaniment instructor. Yes, from my group. Apparently, we went too fast. Mark sped ahead of us and soon we couldn't see him. So our group split into three portions. Me, Lu Yang and Ming Xuan at the front, followed by Chuan Yu, Jing Dong, Jonathan, Ephraim, Sean and Jie Xuan in the middle and lastly Kelvin, Benjamin and Vivien the OB Singapore instructor. The three of us at the front moved a lot faster to try catching Mark. And when Jing Dong behind tried to get us to stop by...Singing? We assumed that he was...singing. So Jing Dong and gang ran forward too...And Mark said "Take the obvious path" but the route to our campsite was not that obvious. So Kelvin, Benjamin and Vivien took the left route up...to nowhere. Lu After the majority of us settled down at the camp site and started pitching tents and starting fires, we finally noticed that Kelvin, Benjamin and Vivien were missing. Iszree, our other instructor stayed with us to help us with the tents and fires while Mark went searching for the lost ones...God...It was rather depressing for the first day to have something like that happening. Of course...Mark returned with them thankfully. 2 hours later. Benjamin fell down apparently and claimed his leg was injured. By the time which, all of us had eaten instant noodles and shared some curry chicken (Worsening my cough) and to top things off, it started raining. So we couldn't sustain the fire and we couldn't cook food for Benjamin and Kelvin. Waaaaa, we had to relinquish our biscuits and chocolates to fill them up...That really shook the foundations of the group...I think. That night was mad though. First of all, I slept at 8.30pm for the first time in 6 years...Second, the entire night was an harrowing experience by itself. There was simply insufficient space in the tent and poor Ephraim had to lie down on the wet groundsheet. I was lying on my haversack, until Jonathan's haversack overlapped mine perpendicularly. I ended up leaning on his haversack while he attempted to lean on his so I kept pushing his haversack down off mine while he kept pushing it back. In a way, the night was rather sleepless with me waking up at two hour intervals and finally deciding to stay awake at 4.30am. Lu Yang just learned that the leeches (Yes, those unsquishable brinjal-like bloodsuckers) would fall off if you put powder on them so he was like scattering powder all around to form some sort of powder barrier around him to keep leeches out. So far, him, Jing Dong and Jonathan I think had been attacked by leeches. It was the first time I saw them though. I went to wear my shoes and conveniently, Ephraim discovered a leech in my shoe...I got it out and yep, doused it with powder before attempting to squish it with someone's slippers. But the accursed leech refused to be squashed but climbed onto my finger with those foul suction cups so I flicked it out of the tent. We were supposed to leave latest by 7am but sigh...You know we tend to live in this world of fantasy...Like Ms Sunita would say "That is Utopia." Thanks Iszree who cooked the best rice ever (Thinking about this now...Our group never did cook any rice ourselves) and Ming Xuan, Jonathan and Ephraim who helped in washing the utensils and tupperwares. The second day was the worst (for the trekking part) because there was still the misallocation of the rations and Lu Yang ended up carrying much more than he ought to have. Partly due to the lack of sleep I think, I myself was exhausted. And of course, the packet of trash enlarged itself miraculously and worse, split itself into three. So Ming Xuan took one bag, Lu Yang another and I took the last one. I noticed that Sean Lai moved fast, but didn't know where to step so he ended up moving rather slowly since he kept slipping. So I requested for Sean to take the garbage bag. He agreed and I was like "wow" then five minutes later he passed it back to me. I just shrugged and Ming Xuan gave me that incredulous look. So very helpful. Dota really helped to link people though. It acted like the mRNA and tRNA in protein synthesis, chaining up those who played dota (the nucleotides) together. On the second day it was mainly discussing builds with Ming Xuan and Lu Yang and making our way through more treacherous terrain. The kind whereby you are walking on 70 cm wide ridges and may fall down 7 metres to your sharp, rocky demise in the river, or get impaled on multiple 10 cm spikes on trees as you roll down. Fortunately, I got neither fate, but got stung by a bee...Along with Lu Yang and Ming Xuan. But Lu Yang's sting was the only one swelling up though so we applied calamine lotion at the resting point and I got to slice a leech which sucked Jonathan's blood into two with my fingernail! :) We advanced! While Ming Xuan and me (mostly me) kept on repeating Omniknight's voice set quote "The light is my strength". So when we finally came out of the jungle into the clearing and saw buildings! Wooden houses! I had strength immediately! I slumped down on the grass...Only to find out that we had an hour to go...But it was definitely worth it since we actually had a roof above our heads for the homestay. Now let's fast forward till the Imperial Kitchen session...Ignoring the leech on my foot...The one tortured on the table...The one Jonathan was trying to shake off...Ok! There! Second night's menu: (For the group, instructors and hosts)

1) Canned Soy Sauce Chicken with carrots
2) Fried Long Beans with Soy Sauce, red onions and Salted Fish
3) Instant Curry Chicken and Fish from the can
4) Cream of randomness soup with carrots and french onions (Cream of Chicken Knorr brand, Cream of Mushroom Knorr Brand, 3 packets of Ajinomoto chicken flavour)
5) Multi-grain rice (Prepared by the hosts)

Presenting the chefs:

1) ME MUHAHAHA
2) Ephraim
3) Kelvin
4) Jonathan

The meal turned out great. Well of course, with Michelin Star standard chefs! Anyway, the most popular dish turned out to be the soup! Strangely, those filthy poisons that come in the form of processed powder actually taste good? And as usual...Dishes were unwashed. Chuan Yu kindly helped to wash a few, thank you. And I washed the rest. Thank Ephraim for shining the torch while I washed them. Was nice talking to you then haha. That night was the best. After washing, we boiled water and Jonathan, Jing Dong and Kelvin helped prepare tea. So we sat by the gasoline lamp (One flame. There's no electricity) and just talked. Vivien sure knew a lot more about our school. Talked about people mainly, gossiping from Samuel to Mr. Hon. It was great just sitting there sipping tea and chatting. Ephraim was shocked at how ill-informed he was haha but now, would you rather I never told you about Samuel huh? We did that till about 9.30 when we slept (Another record-breaking time). It was a dinner that loosened ourselves, one that allowed us to open up...A brief period of reprieve, I somehow forgotten I was stranded in the middle of nowhere with hardly any form of modern technology with the atmosphere around. Of course, as we all know, too comfortable a dinner gives you nightmares. In my case, leeches. I sporadically tossed and turned as I dreamt of them crawling onto me although I knew very well that I was high atop in an attap house above dry land. And then sometime in the morning noticed I had crashed into Ming Xuan by rotating my body too much. Oh, I discovered that Ephraim doesn't live in landed property but in a HDB flat. It came as quite shock though as I was always under the impression that both him and Gregory were extremely rich. But then again, considering the fact that his allowance is twice of mine...

Third day was the worst. We started out quite refreshed and I managed to kill an hour or two by discussing dota with Jing Dong and Lu Yang. I was moving behind with Jing Dong while the others went to the front. But somewhere along the way after crossing bridges with rotten planks, I appeared in the middle of the group again. And curses! Another leech on my ankle this time...I sprayed repellent on it and watched it shrivel up. Hmph. Why was I so kind to let it die such a quick death...But since we were in midst of trekking, I guess I had the Hobson's choice (As cliche as this sounds...). My load was lightened considerably after I emptied my haversack of those cumbersome cans but instead I got the pot...But with no more vegetables, cereal packets and cans...I felt so much more carefree, somehow. I guess that would be the psychological effect manifesting itself...Everything went rather smoothly, even after lunch when we were crossing the gushing waist-deep river. Apparently, Mother Nature succeeded in a pre-emptive strike that the instructors didn't anticipate. In my opinion, there was a landslide, which cut us off the main route since a tree was blocking the way. So what the instructors did was to cut down another tree (YES I KNOW, I STOOD THERE HELPLESSLY) and tied each end to either bank of the river. So they formed some sort of human barricade (three men, or was it two?) and everyone crossed one by one. Those smaller in size...Like me...Would risk getting swept away by the rapids...Those bigger...Spell trouble for the instructors carrying people over. Well then all hell broke loose - Mama Hill (On the second day there was a baby hill, and the third well, mama hill). I didn't have any trouble because I didn't feel mentally exhausted. And probably because I had adequate rest the night before. Jie Xuan, Ming Xuan, Lu Yang and I managed to cover like half the hill by talking about food. We just kept going on about sushi, ice-cream, donuts et cetera...Haha I found out that Sakae Sushi has this sushi buffet thing in the afternoon at $13++ thanks to Jie Xuan. I should go sometime for the sushi. And Ming Xuan said there was super cheap sushi in Malaysia near his relative's house. And we were discussing what food to buy when we got back to Senai airport. Afterwhich, our group split up...Again...Ephraim at the front, me in the middle, Jonathan at the back...And we got overtaken by 2 groups because of that mistake. Basically due to the fact that those at the back never got to rest at all while the front kept on moving. Other groups took rests as a collective and naturally, moved faster overall. We all stopped somewhere near the summit and waited for the rest of the group. I took Ming Xuan's jerry can to balance the weight of mine and Lu Yang was very kind and generous to share his 6 granola bars among the 11 of us. Then we moved on and heard the other groups singing "man jiang hong" ridiculously. Then I started talking about food and fashion with Ephraim but our conversation was short-lived as it started pouring...In spite of me repeatedly casting sun spells...We were soaked...To the skin...And I totally froze up, even with my jacket. I could barely move and felt so lethargic. My movements became forced and slow as I helped with pitching the tent and then offered to go help make dinner. Sadly, we couldn't go near the stove as they wanted to cook for us (How nice!) so Sean and me were banished back to the cold, algid tent. Sean and Jing Dong stayed outside under the shelter of the locked up hut's roof. Ephraim, Jie Xuan, Me, Ming Xuan, Kelvin and Lu Yang were in the tent. Everyone huddled together, except Lu Yang. Apparently, the frost effect affected him on a much greater scale than the rest of us. At first, I was reluctant too but then I acquiesced and the 5 of us crossed each other's shoulders with our arms to concentrate the body heat. Next part was totally random. As the other groups started singing, we decided to sing as well...Conduct songs...Twinkle Twinkle Little Star...French Je m'envole? Salvation came in the form of a WARM dinner. Rice, winter melon, potato and something else...Oh yes, and I took the chance to ask Mr. Yong how he knew French (I was saying depechez-vous to my team when he passed us and said depeches-toi!) amidst all the chattering and shivering. The food gave me strength (Though it should have been the light since I photosynthesize. Wait, does Ivy photosynthesize?) and restored my mobility. At least I could function normally and talk to my group members. Jonathan didn't finish his food and felt like vomiting. Lu Yang didn't even come with us to collect the food from the instructors at the house they were staying in (Yes, only the poor participants have to camp outside) as he was well, frozen solid. So we brought food down to him and started laying the groundsheet...Me, Ming Xuan and Lu Yang, despite his violent shivering, did that and moved the haversacks onto the groundsheets. I really got to see how unfavourable conditions bring out the worst in us. Ming Xuan was spouting expletives as we were the only ones actually helping with the groundsheet while certain others...Could stone there. But I'm happy the furthest I got was "Walao" but then again...It was bad enough. In the tent, things got so much better as most of us were much drier. I actually changed (Yes even my underwear) into a fresh set of clothes. But of course, using a towel to cover some parts of the anatomy not normally shown in public. With the help of more prickly heat powder,I dried up more and didn't feel as sticky. Lu Yang, however, after regaining his strength, spammed powder as though it was such a great absorber of moisture, resulting in the formation of what Ephraim would call "White slush". The area was much bigger and definitely more cosy than the first day. So we talked a little and finished what should have been the next day's pseudo-lunch (The tiger biscuits). But since Jing Dong and Sean continued to camp outside under the hut with Bing Lin and Kai Yuen, they didn't get any. Sad, but it was raining and no one wanted to wet themselves during a delivery. The notable thing about that night was the extreme frigidity. According to Jonathan, it was 11 degrees. I thought lower, given the howling winds and torrential rains atop the 4000 feet high hill...Mountain? We were shivering throughout the night. Even with my long johns and thankfully, gloves and myself wrapped in a blanket, it was chilly. I woke up at 12am (To my disappointment) and then at 2am when I woke up to relieve myself. Yes, urinating in the woods. Ah, the great outdoors! (That's what enchantress says) But in the darkness, I accidentally stepped on a tent peg, and broke it. It didn't really matter since we had to pick up branches to use as tent pegs but I was more afraid of the rain water coming in. But it was the peg at the end so I pulled the string into the tent and closed up the opening. The peg at the other side broke too so I could pull the string from that side too and completely close up the opening which made things much better as the winds could no longer assault us. Then there were these "thwack" sounds that plagued my sleep together with Jing Dong and gang singing songs which either trailed off to nothingness or had no lyrics. In the morning, I found out the "thwacking" sounds was Jing Dong chopping firewood?! He slept for about an hour or so apparently. Sean was coming in and going in out of the tent periodically but Jing Dong spent the entire night outside with Bing Lin and Kai Yuen. To my surprise, Jing Dong and gang had a fire burning, albeit a tiny one that survived on the dismal amount of solid fuel left. So Jing Dong was still chopping firewood and I could finally warm my hands after a night's freezing. But really! Xin ku nin le! Unbelievable! Bravo for those who slept outside, really must have frozen. Breakfast was instant noodles. Ephraim, me and Jing Dong went collecting the tupperwares and then delivered the food to our camp site. We then took a group photo and ate. Unfortunately, for a big fat TIGER leech that had been taking its breakfast on Chuan Yu...I got it onto a leaf, and poured the remaining half of my Maggi instant noodle MSG powder onto it. Mmmmhmm, I enjoyed every last second of watching it shrivel up as osmosis murdered it. So very cute. Imagine if the leech could speak! It would be screaming in agony and me? Laughing of course! Like duh...Anyways, we managed to set off quite early. 7.30 am in fact. And surprisingly, the first hour or two was barely noticeable. It was such a pleasure talking to Ming Xuan and Ephraim. Crapping, that was what I called it. Crude yes, but effective nonetheless. We just talked and talked about everything and anything under the sun. About Hillary, Obama, the retarded Nicholas Sarkozy and even about how our parents disciplined us. But this walk which was supposed to be short, was not. We kept getting scammed as Iszree kept telling us "very near", "soon", "another 20 minutes". Which of course translated to the opposite. But the temperature, atmosphere and all was quite nice with the cooling winds and dense fog. Plus, the terrain was rather manageable as compared to the previous three days of trekking. We reached the summit and wow, breathtaking. Literally, since all I breathed was cold air. So we took photos and just went on and on. Until the Mile 32 point! Which was where the buses were waiting to take us back to the base camp! Goodness! And I was speculating if we would fall down that small cliff while descending to Mile 32 and die so we would never return to civilisation. But here I am typing. I slept throughout the bus trip back and well, so did most of everyone else.

The last two days were most...Bonded? Well interesting events were the torturing of the leech Jonathan found in his shoe and how Kelvin threw the jerry can onto the roof of our dorm. For the leech, we were experimenting with it so we tried adding different chemicals to see its reaction. Benjamin provided the toothpaste, hand sanitizer (ethanol) and some gel thingy with phenol in it. So we applied all to the leech which was placed on the chopping board and then chopped it up using the fork of Mark's swiss knife. Poor knife...After the land expedition, we had to keep and wash the stuff. So Kelvin and the others washed the ground and tent sheets and the haversacks. While, Benjamin and me washed the tupperwares and utensils and I had to scrub majority of both the stubborn-stained pots. But suddenly it rained and Kelvin and the others started throwing stuff which was left on the grass to dry into the sheltered corridor. We left the groundsheets and tent sheets there so the rain could wash them but Kelvin started tossing the haversacks and jerry cans and somehow one flew too high and landed on the roof. Thank god we didn't have to pay for that though. The total fees we incurred were from one jerry can we lost which cost RM5 and the food ladle which we left at the hosts' house which cost RM15. We lost one mug and one sponge too but I stole a sponge from the kitchen washing area and we found a mug in the equipment storeroom. The sea expedition was cancelled due to the strong currents so we could stay in the dormitories! No more camping! So we did some rock climbing and kayaking for the first day. Rock climbing was ok except that the rocks were so mossy that I took an extraordinarily protracted time to scale the wall but going down was relaxing. Kayaking was a total disaster. Me and Ming Xuan, unfortunately, chose a kayak with a hole! So we were like the last pair as everyone else overtook us. And we thought it was the current or something wrong with our coordination that impeded our progress. Not to mention, our kayak somehow filling up with water so rapidly. Halfway through, one of us rocked the kayak too much and we CAPSIZED. MERDE! Curses! In that filthy water which contained god-knows-what that has been washed down from villages. Not to mention we were near to the part of the river which connected to the sea so all the filth composition would be much higher than average. But we were past caring about that so we did the see-saw thingy which we learnt at OB Singapore to empty the kayak of the water before getting in again. Sounds easy, no. Only when we got in did mark spot the hole. Ming Xuan said it was a good thing we capsized or we would never discover the hole. My sentiments too. So Mark asked if we wanted to turn back or continue. We asked if there was still a long way to go and Mark nodded. So of course we turned back. We certainly didn't want to capsize again. Mark took of his shoe and gave it to Ming Xuan. The reason? To bail out the water...I paddled at the front while Ming Xuan at the back bailed out the water. After reaching the shore, we changed a kayak and paddled back. We only took 10 minutes to reach the spot where we capsized while with the malfunctional kayak we took 30. We paddled for a few metres more before we saw the other kayaks returning. So we turned 180 degrees and headed back to shore. Meh, we still got overtaken but hey, third position's not bad. That night was so much fun, playing bridge till 11.30 pm. And of course we woke up ON TIME the next morning (There is NO insinuation) and went for the rafting competition. Everything was rather ok except for group 4's raft design. Creative, yes. Efficient, no. They were moving at less than half the speed of the other rafts, as comfy and stable as it was. All the other group's rafts had the similar basic design but each group won a different match. We had reflections, debrief and the group performances. Rafflesia had a wonderful presentation using some Singapore Town song. They changed it and could cover the entire land expedition rather well. Jonathan Foo's group tried to be funny again and did a parody to make fun of people...How original. Mat Salleh which was Matthew's group (We had an unwritten alliance between both groups) did a prize presentation but it wasn't any ordinary prize presentation. The presented a Hwa Chong PE shirt which they kindly defac- I mean, beautified with the OB Sabah logo and all. Two almost identical shirts (all done by hand) presented to the two instructors. Our group Hang Tuah, rewrote a song "If we hold on together". Here are the lyrics:

Some lost their way
On the very first day
We went so fast
They drifted away

We were believing
They were not missing
And the sky was getting dark

Mark went searching
For Ben and Kelvin
Finally found them with luck

If we hold on together
Our hopes and dreams will never die
Dreams see us through to forever
Where clouds roll by
For you and I

Crossing rivers
Attracting leeches
Feeding on us
Crushed them in disgust

Sprayed repellent
They were fun to burn
Reduced to mere ashes and dust

If they held on forever
We would have been a bloody mess
Receiving first aid together
Where we can't rest
Stuck in the savage nest

Eventually we overcame
Adversity
Difficulty

That's reality

Yup, it's a little abrupt ending like that but it was the best we could come up with within our congested timeframe which had many bridge games squeezed in. Going back to the aiport...Saying bye to the instructors...C'est la vie. I learnt a lot. From Mother Nature who provided the harsh conditions. From the friends in my group. From the instructors. From Mr. Tan and Mr. Yong. From all the mistakes I made, the group made and others made. It was torturous. But if it could strengthen me, like OB Singapore, not just physically. But psychologically in the interpersonal and intrapersonal aspects. I can't transfer my experiences over to anyone reading this post or anyone who wants to know how the camp's like. It's like...A growing process...Like experimenting with different types of soil. It tests the plant. The plant may start out poorly, but as it adapts...Slowly, it grows and probably in a better way than it could have in its original environment. I have made many friends and yes although Mark did pose this question "How long do you think Hang Tuah will last"...I believe, for quite a long time. At least, for me. I got to know people I have never ever spoken too. Negative impressions which were totally replaced with positive ones. Nevertheless, the inverse occurred too but it was an eye-opener. As much as I hate to say this...These camps help...They reassemble the bits and fragments of my long-shattered self-esteem. And I'm grateful for that. At least now I can say hi to people first, not the other way round.

P.S. Will post pictures once I get them.

Dark Memories[7:09 PM]

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