Wednesday, April 09, 2008
"It's like I'm lost
It's like I'm giving up slowly
It's like you're a ghost that's haunting me
Leave me alone"
~ Addicted by Kelly Clarkson
I managed a weak "hi" while Si Heng managed an apathetic "hello". A result of friendship built on conflict? These days...It's either that or I just walk past him altogether...I wouldn't dare call it friendship now...Something so frayed...Weakened...Something that might not have even existed in the first place...And yet the pain was so very real. A friend respects. Even the most distant ones do. For only then can one be considered a real friend. A friend doesn't need to stick to cordiality nor manners always. A friend is always there, inherently sensitive regardless of his or her personality, ready to lend a helping hand anytime. Only a true friend insults and everyone has a good laugh. But when the interaction fizzles out, the cruel hands of time separates the both, gradually eroding the bond in between. And yet if the very foundation of this friendship was built on mutual distrust, cordiality on the surface, held together by but the most plastic of facades...All the interaction in the world wouldn't cement anything in place. Somehow...I feel that this has happened eons ago between Si Heng and me...And so, I do not enthusiastically seek new friends anymore...I do not want to go through the same suffering, the nature of which I have already elaborated on countless of times. It was hell, hell...Help. Therefore, I have decided...I will not start on or continue any friendship, if I perceive it to fail anyways in the future. It would be good for both parties if I didn't get torn into pieces that much.
Math test tomorrow.
Dark Memories[8:22 PM]
_____________
